Episode 71

We return to San Francisco with two new secret boozy locations! Jordan introduces a new segment with the inspiring tale of an intrepid vegan who raised $10,000 in donations for... her vacation. Erika laments the disappearance of a San Francisco institution. Plus, wiseassery.


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Episode 70

We relocate to yet another exciting bar to delegate super powers, discuss the Bay Area Rapid Transit's shortcomings (namely: BART cops keep killing civilians), and some other stuff, all while keeping a shrewd eye on the SFPD while they attempt to hassle commuter cyclists.

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Episode 66

We take spam seriously! And explore whether real lesbians actually exist in the wake of LesblogGate. Plus, Shenanigans and Japes from the Sporting World with That Gentleman of Funny Stories, Pranjal.

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Episode 64

We get waist-deep in a whole lotta reader mail and then tackle a bunch of feminist issues, plus we address Danielle Steele's problem with San Francisco.


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Episode 63

The Cosmopolitan Hour gets transformed into Mean Girls for Episode 63! We read some fan mail, discuss fashion, and then talk shit about commoners in the street from our high horses.

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Episode 62

Peg Bundy. Don’t hassle us, we’re locals. Our favorite show and the resulting all girl vegan motorcycle gang. Jordan wants you to wear a helmet, or else a serial killer will abduct you in France! The living soap opera of douchey bike hipsters, weird looking boobs, and San Francisco’s cutest hobo that is Jack Kerouac Alley. Plus a showdown faceoff between the Canadian and American ten dollar bills. WHICH COUNTRY WILL WIN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE?!?! Also, our long-anticipated and highly sought opinions on StockPhotoGate 2011. Gross dudes hollerin in the street. Damn, we talk about a lot this week.


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Episode 60.5

Guess what? We recorded two versions of Episode 60! Turns out our recorder is not the piece of crap we thought it was.

In this episode we discuss slap-happy frat boy pervs in punk bars, illegal immigrants fight back, Scientology and other ridiculous religions, goin’ home to Mama Canada, and more about our crazy exes.

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Episode 50 ExtraVeganZa!

It's the 50th Episode, you dudes! To celebrate, we drink some actual Cosmopolitans, get sloppy, and say ridiculous shit. Plus, another one of Pranjal's Funny Stories, stompin' on fat haters, and the dish on the 20th High School reunion. Not one of ours, Jordan's husband's, because he's old.

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Episode 47

We find ourselves having to tackle fat hate (AGAIN), take a trip down memory lane, and discuss our worst temp jobs ever.

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Episode 46

We say some things and do some stuff! Jordan crawls out of her phlegm-crusted sick bed to help Erika dole out advice on vegan PMS coping skills, how to win all liberation movements, and the loudest goddamn background douchebag in all of San Francisco. Yes, braying jackass at Mad Dog in the Fog on the evening of Wednesday, September 8, 2010, we are indeed referring to you.

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Episode 39

We interview Laura of Vegansaurus.com! She is hilarious, sassy, and (gasp!) VEGAN! She loves her caps lock; we love her.

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Episode 36

Erika's back from her Utah roadtrip, and the ladies shoot the shit about adultery and feminism in the media, as well as Mormonism, little people, and some other random craziness.

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Episode 35

We talk about obsessive self-Googler Lierre Keith (hi Lierre!) and her appearance at SF Anarchist Book Fair. Plus two movie reviews of 80s horror classics- with a twist!

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Episode 33

Tips on tipping, what we were up to in 1988, and we reintroduce ourselves.

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Episode 31

We delve into the terrifying minds of ex-vegans and say some really crazy stuff to be noticed by them. We also do some more hatin’ on Whole Foods CEO Wacky John Mackey. A blast from the past as Erika talks about R.L. Stine and Christopher Pike books and reviews 1987 instant classic The Monster Squad. RIP Howard Zinn.

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Episode 29

The super-late holidays/New Year’s episode! We discuss popular bands we secretly and not-so-secretly hate and have an awesome ex-boyfriend-bashing session. Who will win the Manipulative Liar Showdown, Nude Nature Boy or Ol’ One Testicle? But who’s this dark horse, Fake HIV Meth Addict? Tune in and decide the winner (or supreme loser) for yourself! Send us your bad ex-boy/girlfriend stories at TheCosmopolitanHour (at) Gmail (dot) com!

Retractions and corrections: Erika has huffed too much Elmer’s glue and her brain is scrambled and she refers to Billy Idol as “Billy Joel.” She apologizes to Mr. Idol and his family.

Episode 29

Episode 25

This one’s for the dudes! We discuss a few ads that have been pissing us off lately that try to give men the body image mindfuck that women have been “enjoying” for the past couple of millennia. Plus a dispatch on the richest county in the United States and we respond to a few comments from listeners! You can email us directly at TheCosmopolitanHour@gmail.com.

Episode 25

Episode 24

We started this one with good intentions to talk about sizeism, we really did. Then it sort of degenerates into a messy sludge of distraction, background beeps and roars, and Jordan's insatiable mobile phone. Listen at your own risk.

Episode 24

A Very Special Episode of The Cosmopolitan Hour: Mackeycare

We fly off the fucking handle and rip into Whole Foods founder and CEO John Mackey's All-American Health Care Solution for a full hour plus. Bring extra towels, we're really foaming at the mouth for this one.

Mackeycare! ...(not a musical)

Episode 17

Another live drinkcast from Bender's Bar and Grill! Also with two special guests: Jamie and Molly, one of whom is a dog. Can you guess which one? We talk about men with bangs, more Iron Maiden, and the craziest neighbors ever.

Episode 17